Okkkkk…soooooo… In a world that stigmatizes and stereotypes a woman who portrays confidence in her sexuality, as “easy”, “stupid", unworthy of relationships…or professional careers , CHEYANNE SIMONE has tackled them all. Everything isn’t always what it seems…mentally, physically, emotionally, or even financially, a lot of time there’s something happening behind the curtain. CHEYANNE SIMONE opens up …with full transparency on her life, her ups and downs…mistakes, regrets (there are few), with a lot of…and I mean, A LOT of ACCOUNTABILTY!!! Yes, you read that correctly…A-C-C-O-U-N-T-A-B-I-L-I-T-Y. (few people are able to use this healing tool…it takes a lot of mental responsibility to do so…headroll fingasnap)
When I first met Cheyanne…she was simply…Cheyanne (No Simone). By chance…or by the destiny powers of the UNIVERSE, I ended up being hired at a job, where she was employed before me. It was my first time ever working in childcare. Yes…. childcare! (S/0 to al the childcare workers …whew…it’s a huge responsibility) Cheyanne was the LEAD infant teacher. (In case you don’t know…infants are the most stressful, you really have to love kids, and be fully trained to work with multiple infants at once) Cheyanne was only 18 at the time, and literally running the infant room. Our “boss” (if you could call Mrs. Pat that…more like a mean old lady) at the time was degrading, we were overworked, and very much underpaid. During our lunchbreaks, Cheyanne would talk about “love", relationships, her mother (RIP)who had fallen ill, friends and foes…yeah…pretty much everything “life related”. We would talk about so many things while she would sit on the floor, feeding, or rocking babies…on her break…while I would mostly listen. (*being older I could only listen and allow her to figure things out on her own…with small bits of advice, that I myself didn’t take when I was her age)
Cheyanne’s mother became ill, and it was super difficult to watch…a young woman, working wayyyyy harder than most women her age, trying to balance the emotions of life, with her mother dying…. whew. After making the decision to leave that energy sucking, low vibrational job, I still continued to stay in touch with Cheyanne sporadically. One day she hit me up, with curiosity about dancing aka “stripping”. I was hesitant on the amount of support I was willing to give her. I looked at her… almost as a younger sister. I also knew the feeling of wanting something more or different, because I too had traveled the same path. I decided to give her the Do’s and Don’ts, and even offered her my custom-made dance outfits I had saved (I’m not sure why I saved them…. but I did, S/o to JUILE). I remember thinking “damnnn she’s really about to take this leap”. Her mother had passed., and I didn’t feel it was my place to question any decisions she was choosing to make.
That’s when I started to notice her evolution of confidence (or what seemed like a spike in confidence…more on that later). I was excited, curious, and fully tuned in! I couldn’t believe …this was the same woman!The evolution of Cheyanne…. was now CHEYANNE SIMONE. She’s always been so beautiful. The darkest skin, smooth like melted chocolate, like the Hersheys syrup used for chocolate milk, no flaws, no enhancements (if that’s your thing …cool), but just a real natural beauty. CHEYANNE SIMONE look is really based around her natural beauty. Her signature long lashes, lip gloss, and long hair are always a part of her aesthetic. Her body…reminds me of the women from the 70’s, just jiggly, bouncy, natural…and her smile…WOW…that girl loves to smile! Some women don’t smile…but her smile makes you smile as well. I began to notice tons of promo for all different clubs around the city, but I also noticed inconsistency with her page, and I began to wonder….” what’s going on”?
That’s when out of nowhere, CHEYANNE SIMONE posted her new job, a LAW FIRM!!!! Well, wtfffffff!!!! I assumed she had quit dancing, but the* BOOM, I saw her post her work promo for the club! That’s when my curiosity about Cheyanne (now CHEYANNE SIMONE) and her now SELF REVOLUTION that was happening!
Q.What initially made you want to start dancing?
A. My mom was sick, there was a lot going on, I was over worked, and underpaid. I wasn’t making enough. I’ve always wondered about dancing; I just needed a lil push. I needed a better source of income.
Q. What were your first thoughts, when you first got hired and were actually working in the strip club?
A.I was like “OMG’, “I SHOULDN’T BE DOING THIS”, I was terrified, I didn’t know how to hustle yet, I didn’t know the hustle, I didn’t know how to approach or talk to people.
Q.Where did you start?
A. I started off at The Alibi (the world’s smallest strip club…yikes), I eventually got the hustle down, and was able to start talking to more customers.
Q. What were some of your fears about working in the strip club?
A. Really, my spending habits, I was making more money but blowing it at the same time, I mos def needed better money saving habits. I also need to get over my fear of pole tricks, I would make more money… if I could conquer the pole…I need to learn pole tricks.
Q. Where did you go after the Alibi?
A.The pandemic hit…it really shut things down for a min, I picked back up at LIDO’s, money was slowing down, and I needed consistent money…so I started applying for jobs as well. Cleveland money is kinda….ehhhhhhhh
Q.How did you land the law firm job?
A. Someone who knew my dad, she suggested I apply and I did and got the job. It’s still kinda…ughhh but I’m thankful to be able to have multiple sources of income.
Q. What was it like having your mother pass away, while you were at the peak of adulthood?
A.When my mom passed away…I just found myself in a downward spiral…spiraling out of control, I had so many emotions, I was dealing with a lot of other things in my life prior to my mom passing. There were multiple tragedies in my life, back-to-back…constantly. I couldn’t catch my breath; I began to act out I guess you can call it.
Q. Acting out…how would you describe “acting out”?
A.I began to drink heavily…my drinking…I mean I can honestly admit that I pushed some of my friends away, a lot of my friends… I destroyed our friendships, from drinking. I became unbearable. I was drinking to cover up my lack of self-confidence. Drinking gave me courage…. or that’s what it felt like…
Q.When did you realize, you needed to change something, yourself, your situation?
A. I was developing a REPUTATION, a misrepresentation about me, given by others. I can admit I was doing things, I was making bad decisions, but I wasn’t doing some of the things that people said I was. There were rumors being spread, and those rumors were interfering with my relationship I had with my boyfriend at the time. He and I were in the same “friend” group, which consisted of mostly guys, “All you need is weed and a bottle”, was a rumor that I found so hurtful, so demeaning, so unnecessary… I think that’s when I realized…I had to save myself, and my reputation, I knew I was not who I needed to be.
Q. How did you bounce back?
A. I had to really realize I was all alone. I had to deal with a lot of past traumas that I wasn’t healed from. I had lost so many friends, and I am holding myself accountable for that, some friends couldn’t stick around, I don’t blame them. There’s 1 friend well…l ex friend…that I’m still like “fuck you” …but being at my lowest really showed me who my real friends are…it really did.
Q,What are some steps you have taken towards your revolution, self-healing?
A.I had to tell myself to ‘GET THE FUCK UP”, Don’t sit and wallow. People make the mistake of sitting around feeling sorry for themselves, just sitting in pity, when in reality, LIFE IS GONNA KEEP MOVING ON. You gotta get back up! You have to hold yourself accountable at times for certain things that happen…. not everything …but be honest with yourself. I am also in therapy. Therapy has helped…people fear therapy…but yeah…Therapy has opened my eyes to certain things I wasn’t dealing with. In the end…nobody can help you BUT YOU! You have to finally decided to help yourself. It’s up to you.
Q.What have you learned about your emotions?
A. I’ve learned that depression can look like a lot of different things. Depression can be disguised as a beautiful woman, who’s well put together, hair done, nails done, maybe even smiling. Even when I would get my mani pedi and be perfect from head to toe, I still was lacking self-confidence. I still was feeling unloved, sad, alone. Those things can’t hide how you’re really feeling inside…it never works. I’ve also learned that …being alone… totally by yourself is hard…if you don’t love yourself. You have to forgive yourself in order to love yourself and also take accountability for life.
Q.When do you feel most beautiful?
A.I’m still trying to figure that out, I thought it was when I had my hair, nails, or makeup done, out having fun…but it’s not. I’m still on my journey of finding self-love, I’m learning how to “date myself” and be ok with being alone with myself. I don’t want to make the same mistakes of dating the wrong people.
Q.When do you feel most accomplished ?
A.Honestly …when my house is clean, sheets are clean, organized…the small accomplishments.
Q. What’s your favorite smell?
A.Vanilla! I love the smell of vanilla, or apple cinnamon, my place smells like apple cinnamon!
EVOLUTION means, the gradual development of something, especially from a simple to a more complex form. REVOLUTION means, a sudden radical or complete change. (*Kinda like a paradigm shift) CHEYANNE SIMONE , the evolution and revolution is an ongoing process, but what makes me soooo supportive of this woman, is that she isn’t afraid to do it in front of everyone. With social media, our mishaps, flaws, or failures… are so easily accessible to any and every one… at any moment. People can easily judge you with a “like” or “dislike”, but being able to overcome that fear of judgment, or being able to take constructive criticism … rebuild, repair and take ACCOUNATABLILTY… is forgiving, and POWERFUL!!!
Trust me…I’ve had my share of “fuck ups”, I think most of us have. (Admit it) as a young woman who’s had to overcome so much, and still isn’t even 30 yet …wtfffffff. Being able to figure out who you are and what you want in life …is an accomplishment, and IT AIN’T EASY .I will always support anyone who’s repairing themselves mentally and emotionally. Respect their paradigm shift. XOXO
(*Sidenote….to all of you reading this…especially you men, please don’t make the mistake of trying to prey on a woman who’s rebuilding herself. A woke woman is a dangerous woman )
“Everyone has a moment , a moment to take your life back, to do something great…when you get that feeling, Don’t ignore it” -CHEYANNE SIMONE
@cheyannesimone